Real or Not Real?

“You love me, Real or Not Real?”
“Real”

 

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The words I Love You have been said for so many times that sometimes we don’t really know whether the person is genuine and honest about it or not. Sometimes, we do not appreciate when someone says those three words to us until they stop saying that. You feel there is something missing when they stop saying that and you long for them to say that to you again. Yes, we usually take something for granted. We do not know what we have until it’s gone.

“Maybe the three words that have been spoken by so many people around the world were never meant for us.”

Those words were never meant for us. It was too much for us to handle. What happens after we say it? Nothing changes. You cannot make yourself love me even if you have said it a million times. Saying those three words repeatedly does not make your heart feel something so pure and sacred; Love.  We could not handle the after-effect of saying I love you. We just couldn’t.

oh isn’t it funny how words can break someone into million pieces yet also words can bring them together.

Real or not real?

I have asked the same question over and over again and crying for help and hoping someone will whisper to me to say that it is real, it is fucking real. What we had was real, and it was raw and rare. Even though what all they said that it is not gonna work out no matter how hard we try, we won’t be together.

Was it a lie? Was what we had a lie? Or was it merely a game to you? Was I nothing more than a game you haven’t played yet? As if love is something to be experimenting, you are not playing with a toy, you are playing with someone’s feeling.

But,

deep down I still have hope that it was true, it was real. He did love me, he did care, and it was all real. Maybe those three words that he said was genuine and true. Even though we know that everything has come to an end, none of this will perish for we will forever cherish. Regardless what happened, I am pretty sure I had left something for you to be remembered. At least, when the last day of your life when you seem to be taken back to the memory lane when your whole life flashes  by before your eyes, I was there to remind you that you are not alone, and you are loved, and you mattered to me. Believe me, you made me feel something I never felt, it was rare, it was painful yet so beautiful, you made me love myself even more. For that moment, believe me, I knew I was loved. And it was a privilege to once mattered to you.

somewhere down the line, I will meet you there
When the time is right, we will solve this puzzle
together.

Okay.

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